Codependency Therapy

Codependency is sometimes referred to as relationship addiction. Someone who is codependent has an extreme focus outside of themselves. Their thoughts and actions revolve around other people, often cultivating an identity around saving others.

Codependent relationships are marked by a lopsided or unequal power dynamic where the codependent giver enables the taker’s often harmful and irresponsible behavior. People with codependency often have one-sided relationships that are emotionally destructive or abusive.

A codependent relationship doesn’t exclusively apply to romantic partners. Codependency can occur with friends and family members. As a codependent, you’re likely intense in how you deal with emotional regulation, can be easily manipulated, and are often unable to rely on yourself for stability.

What Causes Codependent Patterns?

Codependency isn’t something you’re just born with — it’s a learned behavior that you’re subconsciously taught by those around you, usually at a young age. If you grew up in a family where you witnessed abusive relationships or chronic illnesses, then you may have learned to suppress your needs and emotions to prioritize others.

If you’re codependent in your relationships, you may just be trying to subconsciously imitate your family members or simply be trying to survive in an environment where problems are brushed under the rug or completely denied. Over time, you may have developed low self-esteem and a habit of dependency and emotional caretaking.

According to a research study published in Addiction and Health, codependent patterns can also be influenced by your personality traits.

For instance, women who had more anxiety, and who were less agreeable and less open to new experiences were more likely to have codependency with their partners. On the other hand, people who are more open and agreeable tend to cope better with stress and are less likely to become codependent.